I wanted to have a conversation about being present because, in my experience, I have found this concept to be essential for our babies and for our understanding of what is going on in their beautiful minds. And there are just so many benefits to learning how and why to be present in the moment.
What do I mean by being present?
I mean physically, mentally and spiritually being fully present in specific moments with our babies. So this is an idea that I was taught in my Montessori training in a way that really made it seem like being present is truly one of the most important gifts we can give our babies. And I’ll say, after my years in the field, it is so true. Being present is a present to our babies, and it’s one that takes a lot of effort from us to be able to give it, you know?
But it’s one that our babies truly need and really thrive off of when we do offer it. So one thing I will say is that for many reasons it can be difficult to find stillness in your mind, body and spirit to offer this type of presence. But with practice and patience with yourself it’s totally doable.
“Life can be found only in the present moment. The past is gone. The future is not here yet, and if we do not go back to ourselves in the present moment, we cannot be in touch with life.“
Thich Nhat Hanh
Now it should be understood that while it may seem difficult, if at all possible, we should try to be physically, mentally and spiritually present as often as possible. It’s sincerely so essential for their development and offers floods of benefits for both you and baby.
So let me jump into what I mean by physically, mentally and spiritually present.
Being Physically Present with Baby
Being physically present ends up being exactly what it sounds like. Your body is there, you’re ready to be with your sweet baby.
And while in my experience this is the easiest to make happen, it can also be very hard when there are many children & other things happening around you.
So I understand, don’t get me wrong. But when we’re physically present, we offer a world of modeling, we offer language and we offer tons of attachment opportunities that are truly optimal for our baby’s development.
Being Mentally Present with Baby
And now let’s talk about being mentally present. Mentally, being present can actually be very difficult when we have a world of things that surround us, being mentally present can be harder. And yet when we are, we offer our baby’s opportunities for interaction and connection. And we also get to just be in their world.
I have found that allowing myself to be mentally present has offered opportunities for deeper observation, where I noticed something or otherwise wouldn’t have if I was distracted. And I’ve noticed moments where I was truly able to work with a baby in such a connected way that you’re present and get to experience that “aha” joyous connection moment with the child as it happens.
But like I said, to be mentally present can actually be tougher. But I suggest if you’re able if you’re able to find specific moments where everything in the surrounding environment is safe and stable, so you feel comfortable only focusing on this one experience.
For example, perhaps your partner is home and you’re able to focus on your baby for a moment. Perhaps your older child is taking their midday nap and your younger baby is awake and ready to play. Or perhaps you’re in a home or school environment where it’s a prepared space fully safe for all other children.
That way you know you everything is as safe and ready as possible.
Being Spiritually Present with Baby
Spiritually being present means bringing that hope and joy and wonder into our experiences with our child. There’s also a sense of deeper understanding, so earning about what’s going on right now in their development. That way we can understand and recognize that they are just this human with these endless potentialities. We can bring in that idea that every day our child is a new child.
They are a child who learned so much from yesterday and one who was learning so much today. They’re a child who has those endless potentialities of who they will be to their world as they grow. THAT sense of wonder. The childish wonder is so essential to being spiritually present with her babies.
And I’ll tell you from personal experience, when we bring this type of wonder into our moments with our babies, we can bring the physical presence, the mental presence and the spiritual presence together.
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Take a listen to Episode 23 of our Montessori Babies Podcast to dive deeper into the Present of Being Present with your baby.